The white soul :)

So I took this when I walked through the long grass in my college forgetting about looming snakes.

The two cats.

So there was a time when i had two cats.

I had adopted the first when it was a little kitten.
a kitten which had been lost and ill treated by humans.
the kitten was bruised and injured.
But I loved my cat.
Soon the thin starved kitten became a fluffy gorgeous ginger cat.
and then I adopted the second cat.
And I loved this one too.
It was a confident young tabby.
the Tabby hid in it's shell of pain.
But I saw the hurt it went through.
And I cared for it, gave it everything I had.
i loved it through and through
despite the playful snarls and scratches.
I thought it loved me too.

Months swam by.
I saw Ginger becoming even more beautiful.
But to see Ginger was a rarity.
But I believed Ginger loved me still.
Tabby stuck on faithfully.
Despite it's playful animosity
it would still return to my side.
And then.
Ginger put out her claws and ran.
And she was gone.
Tabby turned the same way and followed suit.
And I never saw my cats again.

If they come back,
they will never be my cats again.

We painted CityWalk red.

I should have guessed that a day which starts out with singing Christmas carols in the middle of an agressive monsoon would lead to quite an interesting day.
And so it did.
It was a simple suggestion- go to Citywalk to buy Devika's Mom a gift. Well, for starters we trapped an auto where the driver made sure to hit every curb as hard as he could, and meet hairpin dents in the road making us almost fall out of the auto.
So we made it through the floods.
The visit in the mall started out in a very sane way. Like normal teenagers, we attacked the bookstore, where Anon bought her supply of books and I stole a chewing gum from Devika.
As we were extremely hungry people, we headed straight to Food Chowk, which was behind Citywalk. We ordered enough for one person having some sort of vague instinct that it would be enough for the three of us.
And hell it was.
Like famished UNICEF kids, we tore of chicken bones and divided three pieces amongst us. After the massacring of the chicken, there was quiet for a minute, as if reverence to the heavens for the food granted to us.
Whether it was the fact that we had had a very full meal, or whether there was something intoxicating in the soaps we smelt, or whether it was the spanish music in the mall, or the happiness of finding shoes in our sizes, the point is, all three of us became very funny in the heads right after lunch.
Let's go phase by phase.

The Food Bazaar Phase:
So we thought of making a goodie bag for Devika's mom. So we walked into the shop, and looked for chocolates.
It was very narrow space, and Devika was standing right between us. I don't know how it started but-

"Devika, take Mars bar."
"Oh look Toblerone!"
"No, Anandi, Lakshana..."
"No, take the snickers!"
"The Tronsky?!"
"No, TAKE THE LINDT DARK CHOCOLATE!"
"I hate dark chocolate, TAKE SOUR PUNK!"
"ANANDI, LAKSHANA I'VE GOT WHAT I NEED!"
"oh no, take Lindt Classic!"
"No Laki, that is milk!"
"ANANDI, LAKSHANA!"
"NOOOOO, take the Marshmellows, Devika!!"
"oh look Foxes! I used to have them when I was a child!"
"Oh yes! They were in a tub at that time!"
"Oh Devika, look bacon!"
"MOM's VEGETARIAN!!"

So in this mad conversation where Devika could only stutter a bit, it is fair to say that Anandi and I went beserk. Devika was completely cornered.
But then Devika had her turn too.

The Sunglasses Phase:
We saw wigs at a shop. That itself spelt crazy for us, and we rushed inside. Devika pulled on a bob-cut wig, and we paused to look at the effect. She looked like Cleopatra trapped in twenty first century. I pulled on a black wig, and unfortunately being me I couldn't even wear it right. So the black hair flopped down on my face.
realizing that I wasn't too lucky with wigs, I took it off.
And then we saw the sunglasses.
We ran like a pack of chipmunks who had discovered ground nuts.
like six year olds, we messed up the whole beautiful arrangement and tried on every single pair. I seemed to look like a large glittering insect in most of them, though Devika came off nicely in many. Though in one she did look like Johnny Bravo's mother.
I tried on red nerdish glasses too, and I swear I saw Ugly Betty in the mirror.
So the conversation went something like this, while the shopkeepers stood by and stared at us. Never had they seen so much action.
"Wear the green!"
"I'm taking the blue."
"it's 900 rs!"
"Oh no, mine is 600 rs!"
"No no, mine is Rs. 599!"
"That's still 600."
"I look like a bumblebee!"
"No, very letchy!"
(in the middle I tried theatrics)
"lakshana, don't break them! careful!"
"Oh i want the white!"
"here are the white!"
"This is not the white! Is the white?"

in retrospect, we realized that we had practically lost our minds at the sight of sunglasses and had scrambled the entire organization of sunglasses. One daring shopkeeper mumbled and told us to come to the other side to look at the glasses.
We left the shop in fits of laughter.
We attacked Archie the same way.
Then we realized we had better get home. For once an auto was willing to go, and we sang different genres of song- from my humps, to Country Roads, then Linkin Park and of course lovesick Enrique.
Oh dear, what a day.

words to a future daughter :D

Dearest daughter.
YAYY you have to be 18 to read this. And trust me, when you turn 18, I'll be the first to force you to read this.
I am writing this out of inspiration... So here are some things I want YOU to know, and I will try to be as organized as possible. And as you would know, I'm terribly disorganized and scatterbrained. I hope I'm slightly better at expressing myself at the time...when you read this.
Well...I don't want you to be a hard cynic, neither do I want you to be an unrealistic optimist...like I was. Life isn't as terrible, and full of hardships as made out to be...but it isn't the garden of roses you should expect either.
Take each day as it comes, live each day to the fullest. From experience I can tell you, there will be people who will love you more than anything else...there will be people who won't...and there will be those who will be your friend, and just might drop you on the way as they would replace you with someone else. The last two should not make you bitter and resentful to every relationship that comes your way. I'm telling you...being bitter and angry will get you nowhere.
Though, don't take things lying down. If people hurt you or try to suppress you, fight back. Don't be a doormat...I did on many occasions. Don't do that. I repented dearly for it, and I don't want you to go through the same. And please don't apologize for things which are not your fault. I'm saying this from cold experience, where I've believed I'm at fault...and then I analyzed and understood much later.
Cherish your friendships. It takes a long time to get good, solid friends. And there are some such beautiful friendships which will be with you forever. The best friendships sometimes don't come into your life with pomp and blare. They reveal themselves in nicest ways. It takes time, true. But it's all worth it.
Have confidence, believe in yourself. Judge for yourself..who will be there for you, and who won't.
And please work hard at math. I was a disaster at it, and I would love to show off that my daughter is a topper at it.
Make the most of your talents, and I'm sure they will be in abundance.
You will never be alone, I promise you. I'll be there :)
And don't smoke. Once you start, you won't be able to stop. So you better not. It's terrible for your health.
And please learn the recipe of how to make chocolate brownies from your grandmother.
And I want you to read. Read, read, read. The world of books is wonderful. You can travel all over the world by sitting in just one place and reading a book. Please avoid Meg Cabots if you can.
Dream, and dream, and turn those dreams into reality. And if they do crash, don't be brokenhearted. The strongest person is the one to rise and dream again, and make the dream a living dream.
I know you will :-)
lots of love,
Me.

Fury

when fury blazes through your veins
the warm blood gushes through you
the idea of being cheated, and let down again
makes your fingers curl
what sort of madness is this?
to fall for the same traps yet again?
the craze of anger, the delusion of trust
the clear haze of hypocrisy
again.
again. and again.
a sprayed illusion of guilt
thrown back upon you?
its a fury daze.
you live through it.
you feel the fury pulsing through your veins.
and yet nothing can be done.
just burn and suffocate in it.
the fault of believing.
the fault of being gullible.
the fault of being prey.
it smears you.
and you let it smear you.
you let it.
again.
is the realization too late?
how long can the bitterness survive?
no, no.
harder done than said. let it go.
let go of things that never existed.
stop clinging to fistfuls of just plain air.
breathe.
the fury has to be extinguished.
revenge should not be taken.
for revenge hurts no one more than the one who tries to inflict it.

lessons not yet learnt?
is it not time?
has the world not tested you enough?

-wash out.
douse your fury.
even at the point of the reddest flames, your fury won't be noticed.

so pray, tarry. be cautioned.

yeaaah well I just wrote this in a fit of anger and temper :p please don't worry :D

disclaimer

the previous story was written for my best friend for her bday =)
so this post is more or less a dedication to her.

The brighter side of life

As the last month has been hectic, hot, humid-in short the worst month of 2010 in every respect, i decided to write somethings which makes me happy, so when I feel cranky and wonky and miserable, I'll remember this and be happy again :D

sunshine, chocolates, lindt, photo frames, cocoberry, Metro stations, paintings, disney, One Tree Hill, James Lafferty, BOOKS, blue, purple, green. yellow umbrellas, momos, long walks in backlawns, laughs, laughs and more laughs, mad over doughnuts, chocolate truffles, dilli hart, bangles, butter chicken, stories, family, rain, echo lodge, imaginary worlds, babies, football, Kaka, hindi serials, Ben Mckenzie, Creative Writing society, smiles, butterflies, dangling earrings, LSR, nescafe visits, brown sugar, winter concerts, auditions, Hakuna Matata, Lion king, waking up to messages and missed calls, random conversations, scribbling in classes, chuckles, chalk fights, water fights.

this is a part of it. :D and even when things are terrible, these keep me going. :)