Wednesday, March 16, 2011

Pale confusion

you leave me confused.
a pale confusion sets upon me.
i feel baffled
by your dual personality
either i'm your special loved one
or either i'm the preferred ignored
you draw me close
just to push me further away
you remain a dark mystery
yet i feel as if I understand you
i set about to understand why you say and do the things you do
why is there this misty aura around you?
why is nothing clear and simple?
layers, and layers
twisted and shaken apart
truth from lies
yet no lies.
why can't I push you away?
as easily as you can?
why is this friendship fraught
with bewilderment?
you leave me thinking unclear thoughts
you leave me in a blurred haze
is this friendship a blessing or a strain?
in time i feel soothed by it
rest I feel peevish
tension it is
covered by a false transparency of sweetness
I still picture you as I always did.
at times i feel it's all slipping through my fingers
you turn and alter my perception within minutes
yet just to bring it back to the same point...again within minutes.
I can't understand
perhaps I shall never.
you leave me at sea.

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