Glances

They were standing at the far end of a crowded room.
People danced, and people laughed. It was a full riot going on.
They caught each others gaze.
He noticed her first. He noticed how she stood against the wall, taking in her soft drink slowly.
He smiled.
She noticed how he politely warded off people he didn't want to talk to.
His eyes caught hers.
The glances they exchanged, could have gone for days.
They smiled, every few seconds.
They were far apart, but couldn't get closer.
She thought his eyes were intoxicating.
He was enchanted. From her plain bangles to her rusting anklets.
Songs continued playing. For some reason, they stopped paying attention to it.
Somehow only glances mattered.
She walked slowly around the room, not taking her eyes off him.
In his head, they were already dancing.
Her anklet almost slipped off. She bent down, and fiddled with it.
His eyes mocked at her, gently.
Blushing, she didn't meet his gaze for a while.
Unable to avoid any longer, she looked up again.
He raised his glass towards her.
Cheers, his eyes said.
She raised her glass for him too.
Without the drink, she already felt intoxicated.
Electric.
And then he walked up and stood next to her.
Everyone was still dancing and shouting, but for her the world stood still.
The music was loud, but in her head it turned gentle.

Let's dance, his eyes said. She looked nervous. I don't know how to, she shrugged apologetically.

In those few seconds, he held her finger.

And then slowly her hand. 

They walked into the crowd.

He turned to her and whispered,

"Let's learn, then."

And then they realized they knew it all along. 

The earring

She sat at the table, playing with the earring.
The peacock earring.
She didn't have the other one. He had it. And she didn't have the courage to ask him for it.
She traced the blueness of the earring.
It astonished her, how one single ornament could make her relive an entire past.
She touched her bangles lightly. She remembered how perplexed he would be at her matching patterns.
Two on one wrist, three on the other.
She missed how he would play with the earrings. And the smile he had, when he did so.
She had only worn the earrings twice. The first time she met him, and the last time she saw him. In the chaos and shock of that day, she had run and dropped it.
She was sure he wouldn't have kept it. One earring-why would he? They meant nothing to him, now.
Her eyes burned, as she remembered how fascinated he had been when he had seen them the first time. That was what had drawn him to her, he said later.
She sighed.
She almost flung the earring away, along with her bangles. Her bangles seemed to have lost colour, since he was no longer there to comment on them.
But she couldn't throw this earring away. In a strange way, it was what kept her connected to him.
She touched the earring again. She smiled with burning eyes, as she thought of how he used to laugh at her mismatching earrings. She had been so embarrassed.
Yet he had whispered into her ear,
"Laugh and say it's a trend."
This was all she had now.
He probably had forgotten all about it.
With searing eyes, she puts the earring away with the rest of her past.

Somewhere, not too far away, he looks at the earring he has, too. He prays that someone's replaced this pair.
With stinging eyes, he smiles as well.
He'll keep this one.

Rain.

It was unbearable and hot.
The sun shone down mercilessly. She walked on, in what seemed like a desert.
There seemed to be no end.
It became even more uncomfortable and suffocating. The weather finally beat her to her knees.
She sat on what seemed like hot sand. She begged for some cold relief.
There was clearly no sign of rain.
It was getting harder to keep focus, and she was tired now.
She didn't think she could walk much more.
She lay down, unable to take it. Maybe this was how it should be, she thought. She didn't have the strength to get up anymore. The sun had won.
She felt a gentle drop on her head. She shook her head wearily.
It was just her imagination.
She felt another drop.
She lifted her head and looked at the sun.
Except there was no sun now.
There was rain finally. It was coming in small drops.
She hardly dared to believe it.
After this long spell, it was unbelievable. She put out her hand to make sure. She smiled nervously, as another drop pricked her gently.
It was real.
The rain drops touched her hand, slowly giving her energy again. She was still not sure whether it was a figment of imagination.
And the rain came gushing down. She was soaked, but she was happy. She felt alive, once again.
For a few seconds, she stood still. Taking it all in. She felt refreshed, and she felt overjoyed. This wasn't a trick, this was real.
The rains turned into thunder storms.  Lightening streaked the skies. She held her ears. It terrified her, and she almost screamed. Her scream was lost in the rains. She clenched her eyes shut, and wondered why this was happening to her. She decided to fight back and was determined not to be pushed down again.
 And then her eyes sprang open. To her surprise, there was no cruel sun. There was no rain. It was pleasant, and windy. There was no hot sand. Just calm and cool grass under her feet. Just as she always liked it. All was well.
She laughed. Nature hadn't played tricks on her. Her mind had.

Heights

"I'm scared of heights." She whispered.
He looked at her, head tilted to one side. It concerned him, that she was afraid of so many things. He looked into her  eyes. They were full of fear. Fear, which only he could see.
"Will you come with me, if I asked you to?" He asked.
"Where?" she asked nervously.
"Trust me." he said quietly. He extended his hand. She hesitated. He smiled, and withdrew his hand. He walked a few steps. Without warning, she caught hold of his hand.  A gentle, yet firm hold.
He walked up the stairs.
She followed.
There was a silence, except for quiet and steady footsteps.
They reached the balcony. The sun shone....not too brightly, but just pleasantly. A breeze blew. There was a beautiful little garden on the terrace. There were her favourite flowers blooming. She let go of her reserve. She rushed towards them, and then felt embarassed at herself. She touched them gently.  She enjoyed the fragrance, and breathed a sigh of relief. She was beginning to love this little place, even though it had only been seconds.  She felt peaceful again.  She walked towards the ledge and looked down. It was a long way down.
An overwhelming panic took hold of her, and she turned away, her legs feeling unsteady. He was at her side at once. He held her hand.
"Look straight." he said softly.
She turned around again. She did as he said to. And she saw a clear horizon. The panic lessened.
"Better?" he asked.
She turned and a genuinely happy smile appeared on her face. The happiest smile, after a long time.
"Much better." she said, with a return of her roguish wink.

Never sunset.

"Let's go out today?" I said rather nervously. I twisted the tissue around my finger, almost strangling it.
"I'm busy today." He said rather flatly.
"I can help you." I said, my over-eagerness showing itself again.
"I've already got help."
I understood what that meant. He walked away.
I sat down on the chair. I put my head on the table and closed my searing eyes.

We were lying down on the grass, near the stream. It was always sunrise, never sunset. I could breathe easily here. 
It was my place to sit and dream. Everything was serene...peaceful...I, was peaceful, for one. This was where I could live forever.
If only.
The wind blew gently, and my hair flew into my face. He gently pushed it back, something he hadn't done for a while. 
There was a silence, except for the gushing of the stream. I enjoyed this silence. Over here, it was never sunset. 
"How long do you want to stay here?" He said quietly.
"For...a while at least." I said, picking up some wild roses.
"You should go." he said, his eyes full of concern.
"I'm happiest here. It hurts...to go back." I said. 
I had held the roses too tightly. The stems had thorns. My fingers showed angry red marks. But it didn't bleed. 
He smiled and said,
"That should be a hint, for you."
He held my hand tightly. The red marks vanished. 
"That's why I don't want to go back. Wounds don't vanish like that...over there." I said softly.
"Time will heal that. I wish I could. But I've inflicted too many." he said, staring into the distance.
"Why can't you?" I asked angrily.
"Because that's reality. This isn't." 
I had no answer to that. 
"Go back, please."
"Come back with me." 
"I'll be there."
"You won't be there. Not this you."
"Well that's what you have to face, dear."
"I can't. Not this time. Not again." I said, my voice breaking.
"This will hurt you more." 
"Why can't you be like this over there?"
"Because this isn't me." He said quietly. 
I didn't want to admit it. For the first time, it was getting hard to breathe here...as well. The red marks were beginning to appear again. 
He said again with a change of tone,
"You need to face it."
"But I'm happy here."
"You're not. Look, it's sunset." 
And it was.

Anklets.

Oh there he was. Standing against the door, arms loosely by his side.

He was in the middle of a conversation, with some people she didn't know.

She smiled to herself. By the look of it, neither did he. She knew that expression of his so well. That expression of nodding and desperately trying to keep the conversation going.

She was nervous. She wanted to go up to him and say hello.

But it had been too long.

She put one foot forward. Her anklet made a clinking sound.
Should she?

She shouldn't. His friends had come.

Friends she had never known, she had never been introduced to, but friends she knew intimately through his stories.

She took a few steps, her anklets jingling.

What should she say?

A tap on the shoulder? How should she greet him? Be casual, with their normal hugs? No, his friends were there. He might not like it, if she did that.

And it had been too long.

He looked happy. She was happy about that.

She wasn't going to admit that she was slightly resentful. Did he even think about her?

She shook her head and smiled. Over thinking, over thinking. He had always said that was one of her problems. 

She was close now. 

And then she...came. She, beautiful, and graceful, with a fair complexion, which she heartily envied.  Stood next to him, and said some things which made him laugh. Someone who could be introduced to his friends. 

His eyes suddenly seemed full of joy when she was near. 

She smiled a little. 

She remembered him laughing.

But not at what she had said.

Those few seconds seemed like eternity. 

They hadn't seen her yet.

Oh, if only her anklets didn't make such a noise. She hoped that he would turn in her direction.

But he didn't. He was too busy and involved now. 

And she was keeping him engaged in a conversation. She heard bits of it. They were nostalgic about old times and memories. Memories which she had no place in. Something about beaches...a holiday to somewhere...an inside joke about a restaurant which was making everyone laugh. 

She didn't want to hear much more. 

She ran, the tinkling of her anklets couldn't be heard now, in the crowds. 

He heard the anklets.

He turned immediately. 

But she was gone. 

His eyes burned. 

The donut.

He saw her sitting at the table, writing furiously.
Her coffee was sitting beside her, untouched. Sometimes she would pause and look out of the window and watch the rain beating down against the windows. And then as if to remind herself, she would get back to writing.
Her phone rang, and she answered it on the second ring itself. The conversation didn't continue for long, and she put the phone away.
She put her head in her hands. He felt sure she was about to start crying, but to his surprise, she didn't. She just had an exasperated expression and looked tired. She took out her earphones suddenly, and checked her ipod. That seemed to have died too. She flung it inside her bag.
He wondered if he should walk over to her. He took his coffee towards her table, nervously. She didn't notice him. She kept writing. And then the pen ink ran out.
She threw it down in frustration. She looked up and saw him, and turned red in embarassment.
"Oh...hello." she said, with a wan smile.
"Having trouble there?"
"I've been trying to write this article for a while. No idea coming to mind, and the deadline is tomorrow."
Her phone beeped. She checked it instantly. She typed even more vigorously, rolled her eyes, and put the phone away.
It beeped again, but this time she refused to answer it.
"Bad day?"
"A really bad one." she said, trying to smile. She went back to staring at the paper, her hand on her head. Yet he couldn't fail to notice that her eyes were starting to water.
Not knowing how to handle someone crying, he decided to walk away. But before that, he told the waiter, "One chocolate donut for her, please."
She looked up, and smiled. It was a bit of a confused smile.
But it was a smile, nevertheless.